Many men want to know, "How can I last longer in the bedroom".  I need more staying power.  *If you have a medical problem with premature ejaculation (ejaculation before it is desired), your doctor is the first person you should see, as there are medical causes for this.  If you want some non medical advice on things the average Joe can do to be the best he can be, then here goes...

Importance of staying power - If a man satisfies himself, without satisfying his woman, then he will find that she will lose interest in sex.  You will eventually be replaced, at least in her fantasies, if not worse.  So you owe to each other as a couple to work on it.  Openly, honestly, and discreetly, as a loving couple.

Read this paragraph if you have problems staying erect (Erectile dysfunction) - Now guys, if you are too shy to share with your lady that you are taking efforts to combat this, you may be doomed before you start.  The reason being, is that she is very much involved.  I want to avoid the following scenario... You read my articles and begin to work on becoming a better lover, only to be shot down by a woman who doesn't have faith in your abilities.  I'm talking about her "not being in the mood", or just laying there like a bump on a log, with an attitude along the lines of "pull my drawers up when you're finished", then it will be next to impossible to overcome this problem.  As soon as you get frustrated, you will lose your erection.  As well, you will feel contempt for her, after all of your efforts, and being excited about some new things to try, she is not putting in a matching effort.  Share your efforts with her, possibly even reading this article together.  The fact that you are trying to improve her sexual satisfaction will likely delight her.  Your goal is for her to be the vixen she knows she can be, and for her to have faith in you.  Her physical and emotional efforts, is a very large part of the erectile equation, and she has to know that.  Now the rest of this document is more geared towards premature ejaculation.  I touched on erectile dysfunction because many times the two go hand in hand, but I'm getting off topic, so here comes the bedroom talk.

Be stress free, and well slept - It's amazing the difference this will make.  It is a medical fact that this is a factor.  Now one of the tough parts, is that if you are stressed out about the thought of "not pleasing your woman" or feeling you are "not a man".  Then you will many times find these such results.  Take some of the stress off of yourself.  Don't aim to be "the best she's ever had" (not right away, but it is so possible), but start with trying to be the best you can be.  Then set your goals to being the best you've ever been.  I've been through all of these steps myself, and never thought I would be where I am now.  I long ago became the best she's had, and every once in a while I still set a new "high" for her.

First things first - The goal here is not to give her your penis, until she is extremely excited.  The more excited she is, the more wet she is, and therefore the less tight she will feel.  This will bring your pleasure level down a notch, and hers up.  This brings your climaxes closer to each other.  The goal for the guy is to get her to a climax before or during his own climax, or most preferably after she has had multiple orgasms.

Get her soaking wet for at least 20 minutes before entering her with your penis.  If you can bring her to orgasm at least 1 time before even using your penis, then do it.  Tease her with your tongue, a finger, verbal stimulation (talk sexy, compliment, etc...), everything you have.  If talking dirty to her is something that works for her, then do it.  Many women get more excited by verbal stimulation than physical, don't take it personal.

Be erect for at least 10 minutes before intercourse - It seems that when you are erect longer before the intercourse, your penis is "less sensitive" to the physical pleasures.  Sometimes when it is hard for a long long time, it is actually "numb".

Take control - Do it at your pace, withdraw if you get very close to ejaculation.  You can switch to some finger penetration while your penis calms down a bit.  The important part here is to enjoy what you are doing, and stay erect as possible with positive thoughts and mental images.  Going limp is a bad thing as well, as you will tend to get excited, (performance anxiety) and when you overcompensate to bring it back, we will have ejaculation much quicker than we expected.  Also, a soft penis still feels the sexual tingle.  So while you are trying to work with your penis less than hard, you are bringing yourself closer to orgasm, but generally not bringing her closer.  This is counter productive in terms of pleasing your woman.  The goal is to maximize her pleasure, while controlling or "throttling" your pleasure.

Multiple rounds of sex - Now men and women naturally climax at different rates, with the man climaxing first, and more easily.  You are not alone, it is natural.  If you want to become a great lover, you have to find ways to overcome this.  Men climax sooner, and are limp for a little while afterwards.  Now for some people, we are talking minutes, and for some we are talking hours.  If we are talking hours, then I highly highly recommend talking to your doctor about Viagra (I use it, click here for the story of my experiences).  Because men climax quicker, your ability to last longer is going to have to involve "Round 2", and maybe 3.  Sex does not have to end after the guy's orgasm.  I was a little embarrassed at the thought of Viagra, as I wasn't impotent.  The embarrassment is now gone, and replaced with the knowledge that I can now last long enough to satisfy 3 women.  My woman loves it.  I am now sure that I can satisfy her every need, and the sex is incredible, lasting for hours, so where's the shame in that?

Find your technique. - Test various sexual methods, realizing that the one that works for you, is not necessarily the one that works for her. A favorite in my bag of tricks is to switch to short thrusts, while penetrated deeply.  I find the short thrusts less personally satisfying, but still very satisfying for my lady.  Now I have an above average penis, and these strokes are deep inside of her (I feel it touching something way deep inside, and she goes wild as I hit the spot).  If this doesn't have the same effect for you, then try different angles and methods, till you find one that seems to work more for her than you.

So now while you're increasing her pleasure, you're decreasing yours and no longer so close to ejaculation.  At this point you are free to switch to another position if you wish, but if she is really enjoying it, and you think you can get her to orgasm this way, then go for it!  Also realize that women can usually have orgasm after orgasm.  Don't make the mistake of thinking that because she is orgasming, that you might as well do the same.  Give her multiple orgasms - my honey has been calling me her "double digit man" because she loses count, and just knows she's had over 10.

Sex more often - It has been said that a man should masturbate himself to orgasm a few hours before the encounter.   If the body has sperm built up and is "ready to explode", the orgasm is going to come quicker than if you have only a part load building.  Now I have a different twist on this.  In the morning have a quickie in the shower before work.  Ask her to join you in the shower, and pop off a quickie.  When you get home that night then it's no "quickie".  That evening you will find your staying power greatly increased.  Let it be known that the shower episode is a quickie, a teaser for what she's going to get in the evening.

Communicate with her - If you are reading this article, because you feel you haven't been rocking her world, then share with her the fact that you have some new techniques, etc... that you want to experiment with.  Ask for her cooperation and understanding.  Tell her you need to wipe the old score board clean.  Ask her if she will enter the bedroom with the confidence that you can and will rock her world.  This will make a big difference.  While you are experimenting with new techniques, you don't need the stress of performance anxiety. STRESS is an absolute killer in the bedroom.  Have fun.  If you have been "working her" for a long time, and she isn't coming to climax, don't sweat it.  If you are doing a good job, then she is enjoying the ride, an the climax will come.  Tell her you are taking your time, because the enjoyment is in the travel, not arriving at the destination.

Hypnosis - A very powerful way to stop premature ejaculation.  I was lucky enough to stumble across the following hypnosis web-site...

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* Disclaimer - information in this, or any other of our articles is not meant to replace or substitute as medical advice by a doctor.  All information is provided as is, where is, and without warranty of any kind.  Always remember to practice safe sex, and know the risks of all sexual encounters.